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From: Ed P <esp@snet.n>
Newsgroups: rec.food.cooking
Subject: Re: Monday Night Dinner? 6/02/2025
Date: Wed, 4 Jun 2025 15:31:30 -0400
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On 6/4/2025 2:13 PM, ItsJoanNotJoAnn wrote:

> My mom was 16 when she and my dad married and were married
> 42 years when he died.  She was grieving terribly but one
> of my brothers begged her watch his son, her grandchild, as
> he started kindergarten.  She didn't want to, wanted to
> be left to her grief but she said getting him ready daily
> for school, waiting for him get out of kindergarten
> around noon, fixing his lunch, and him being there with
> her saved her sanity.  It gave her something to think
> about and focus on him instead of constantly grieving
> about my dad.
> 
> Hopefully when your son moves in that will give her focus
> on him such as cooking for him and have someone to talk
> with.  I'm not implying she'll be his maid, but it gives
> her something to do, to think about meals and him coming
> home instead of dwelling on her lost life and lost partner.

Everyone is different but life has to go on.  What would the deceased 
person want you to do?  Probably to be happy, not be gloomy all the 
time.  Miss them?  Sure, always will.

If it is your spouse, perhaps you even discussed it.  There should be at 
least some basic ideas of what they want and expect.

I recently spent a week with my friend of nearly 50 years.  If there is 
a heaven and our late spouses are looking down at us, we know what they 
would say.  "Look at them, having a great time together, nice to see it"