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Subject: Harvard to Award Trump
Date: Thu, 17 Apr 2025 20:18:28 -0500
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Harvard to Award Trump Honorary Doctorate for Making its Approval
Rating Soar

CAMBRIDGE, MA (The Borowitz Report)--To show thanks for making its
approval rating soar, Harvard University announced on Thursday that it
would award Donald J. Trump an honorary doctorate.

The Ivy League institution, deeply despised by Americans since its
founding in 1636, released a statement thanking Trump for his
"game-changing service to Harvard."

In the statement, Harvard said that it had received Trump's biggest
public relations boost since the one he bestowed on Volodymyr
Zelenskyy in the Oval Office.

"Donald J. Trump may not have built a wall with Mexico or annexed
Canada," the statement read. "But he has done something far more
monumental: made Americans like Harvard."

https://www.borowitzreport.com/p/trump-does-the-impossible-by-making