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From: The True Doctor <agamemnon@hello.to.NO_SPAM>
Newsgroups: rec.arts.drwho
Subject: Re: Doctor Whoke S01E02 The Devil's Chord
Date: Sat, 11 May 2024 04:46:03 +0100
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On 11/05/2024 04:13, The True Doctor wrote:
> More complete and utter incoherent infantile crap inspired by Loony 
> Tunes instead of science fiction.
> 
> Who the hell is the audience for this garbage supposed to be?
> 
> The episode starts off with a school teacher attempting to groom a child 
> by enticing him with secret piano lessons. Then after demonstrating a 
> few compositions to the boy a ginger haired gay transvestite pervert 
> emerges from the piano and starts giving the teacher a lecture on 
> pronouns in 1925 or whenever the hell it's set.
> 
> The child turns out to be a creation of the ginger haired gay 
> transvestite pervert and is zapped away, after which the teacher is 
> sucked into a musical instrument and zapped away too, and all music in 
> the world becomes perverted.
> 
> After this more Timeless Child crap is divulged to Gibson by Gatwa, 
> dressed in gay clothes and necklaces and prancing around like a fool, 
> going on about how the Time Lords were destroyed throughout time (as if 
> RTD has not done that all before) and his children past and future, with 
> his accent going all over the place, which according to RTD means that 
> he's evil since that is the attribute he gave to the Celestial Toymaker 
> who it turns out is the father of the ginger haired gay transvestite 
> pervert who calls himself, oh the pervert thinks they're a quantum 
> computer, I mean themselves 'Maestro'.
> 
> Gibson wants Gatwa to take her to see the Beatles recording their first 
> album at Abbey Road, and the Beatles are made to look like morons that 
> have no idea how to write good music. Then Cilla Black starts singing 
> into a U47 turned sideways with the diaphragm facing away from her 
> mouth. If the U47 was the multi-pattern version that lets you select a 
> figure 8 polar pattern then it wouldn't have picked up a single thing 
> she was singing if that was the pattern set. Was this deliberate in 
> order to demean Cilla Black or a production error?
> 
> Then they show a classical orchestra playing nonsensical tunes too.
> 
> If the music that was perverted by the ginger haired gay transvestite 
> pervert was that bad then why would anyone develop microphones like the 
> U47 to even record it? Wouldn't they be stuck with 1920s microphones 
> instead and only made silent movies?
> 
> After this Gatwa and Gibson talk to Paul McCartney and John Lennon in 
> the EMI Studios canteen, making them appear to only want to record songs 
> until they can find proper jobs.
> 
> Gatwa then gets Gibson to play something on a piano he's had hoisted up 
> to the roof and people outside start opening their windows to listen to it.
> 
> Davies clearly missed the opportunity to parody the Laurel and Hardy 
> piano delivery sketch in that part of the episode.
> 
> After a few tunes the ginger haired gay transvestite pervert pops out of 
> the piano carrying his out of tune tuning fork and starts sucking people 
> including Gibson and Gatwa into the piano and other musical instruments 
> with quavers, semi-quavers, and other music notation swirling around in 
> the air.
> 
> Gatwa and Gibson escape and then Davies parodies the 4th Doctor taking 
> Sarah Jane back to 1980 in The Pyramids of Mars to show her that unless 
> they stop the ginger haired gay transvestite pervert in 1963 then the 
> whole world in the time she is from (June or July 2024?) will be totally 
> destroyed and her adoptive mother will never exist. The ginger haired 
> gay transvestite pervert then turns up again and Davies parodies the Tom 
> and Jerry or was it the Bugs Bunny conductor cartoon. Yes, there's 
> actually two of them, with Gatwa fighting the ginger haired gay 
> transvestite pervert for which one of them can play the most complicated 
> tune.
> 
> Eventually back at Abbey Road Gatwa and Gibson figure out of thin-air 
> that they can send the ginger haired gay transvestite pervert back to 
> where he came from by hitting the Devil's Chord or something, so Gatwa 
> hits different individual keys on the piano and hits a bum note on the 
> piano the Beatles performed most of their greatest hits on. That's 
> called playing a scale, not a chord. It should have never had any chance 
> of working so how did it even get to be bum note? Doesn't the retard 
> Davies know anything about music? So everything gets fucked and people 
> get sucked into musical instruments again.
> 
> Then out of the blue after the piano is pulled into the studio corridor 
> by magic, and Loony Tunes musical notes flying through the air at the 
> behest of the ginger haired gay transvestite pervert, Lennon and 
> McCartney turn up and decide to play a random chord out of thin air for 
> no explicable reason, since neither of them have a clue about the ginger 
> haired gay transvestite pervert even being there, and that sends him 
> back to his origin.
> 
> Garbage, pure garbage. The writing is absolute shit. You can't have a 
> villain being defeated by pure random coincidences. This is the writing 
> of a 6 year old child that doesn't know how to write a story properly.
> 
> After the villain's demise for no explicable or believable reason Gatwa 
> tells Gibson that there's always a twist at the end of all of his 
> adventures and everyone starts performing and dancing the Twist as if 
> they're in a Bollywood movie to Gatwa singing some crap song, written by 
> Murray Gold, with what seems to be a Sure SM 5B making an appearance, 

Can't be an SM 5 or 5B. Didn't come out until 1966. Must be something 
else with a similar shape.

Might be a Shield M-102.

> the Beatles still singing crap, and Cilla Black still singing into her 
> U47 pointing sideways. And during this idiotic dance routine the child 
> persona of the ginger haired gay transvestite pervert makes an 
> appearance in a doorway, and the musical number continues until Gibson 
> and Gatwa are in the TARDIS and close the doors twice for the finale.
> 
> This is not Doctor Who in any way shape or form. It's a degenerate gay 
> (meaning rubbish) parody.
> 
> Doctor Who ended in 2017!
> 
> 0/10
> 

-- 
The True Doctor https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCngrZwoS0n21IRcXpKO79Lw

"To be woke is to be uninformed which is exactly the opposite of what it 
stands for." -William Shatner